ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Randomize
