Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
