either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize
