Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
Randomize
