i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
