Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
