and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Randomize