i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
ugly people sure do ruin things
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
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