Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
Randomize