operation harelip BJ is a go
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
