She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
