Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
Slut skills are useful in every country.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
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