Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
operation harelip BJ is a go
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize