she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
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