he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
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