I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
If that was your dad, he is hot
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize
