I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Randomize