I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
