i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
