Can i not drive my cunt home
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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