so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
25 Men Confess The Moment They Knew They Wanted To Marry Their Wife
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
You Wouldn’t Guess That These 25 Celebrities Are Complete A**holes
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
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