they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
Randomize
