On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
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