We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize