fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
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