why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
