dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize
