therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
i would punch a child for taco bell
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
I just projectile vomited in a Methodist church parking lot. If Jesus didn't love me before he sure as hell doesn't now.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
