so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
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