I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
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