Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
