yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Randomize
