Someone shit on the floor
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
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