you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
