he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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