Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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