Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
