so explain again why im purple
no
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
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I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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