Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
