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• (415): View more from California

  This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?

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• (804): View more from Virginia

  you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms

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• (253): View more from Washington

  The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.

  Fav 8 1270 3657

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• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat

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  Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July

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• (707): View more from California

  there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.

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• (785): View more from Kansas

  totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted

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• (936): View more from Texas

  If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.

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• (701): View more from North Dakota

  Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.

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• (361): View more from Texas

  do you know where my other puke covered boot is

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  19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced

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• (605): View more from South Dakota

  I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.

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• (407): View more from Florida

  Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear

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• (931): View more from Tennessee

  Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.

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• (702): View more from Nevada

  I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.

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• (307): View more from Wyoming

  All im saying is that my face might fall off.

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• (908): View more from New Jersey

  Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure

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