You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
