apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
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