Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
