That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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