She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize