Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.