I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
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