I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Randomize
