It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
