I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?