I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Ladies don't puke and tell
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Randomize
